The Life and Crimes of Two Tone

What could possibly cause this dog to rape and murder the poor critter victims of the Backyard district of New York City? He had a good childhood of chew toys and birthday parties. His father was a well trained German Shepard and his mother, a Husky, had the prettiest ice blue eyes and a chest full a soft silky fur - a beauty queen indeed. Two Tone attended The School of Canine Etiquette and graduated with flying dog bones. Despite his red rocket showing all the time, he learned to become a gentleman rather than a humper. A remarkable creature with a mind of a murderer - this is the life and crimes of Two Tone.



Here is Two Tone at 5 months, sitting in his Ramen Noodles bathroom.



Two Tone doing naughty things.



Two Tone became a big boy and celebrated his first birthday.



And then this... along with a list of birds, opossums and some injured raccoons that were lucky enough to live another day.



With a new found taste for blood, there was no turning back.



This is the face of a serial killer - Jill Greenberg style.

Museum of Sex

Museum of Sex is holding an exibition on sex and design. The marketing posters looked great but the exhibit was too small and didn't even reach an average height of 7 inches. Luckly there's the "ACTION Sex and the Moving Image" exhibition that showcased old school vintage porn to celebrity porn to hardcore pornography. Here are some pics. If you are under the age of 18, please DO NOT scroll down unless you have a parent or guardian present!

http://www.museumofsex.com

Cute Japanese candies made of latex.



Vintage blow dryers for that untameable wet hair.



Brillo condom to break up grease and fats in the hard to get regions.



First porn in the US? I'm not sure, I've seen older porn at the Barcelona Sex Museum. The ladies were Ruben-esque and definitely more hair back in the day.



"One Night in Paris" and a bunch of other celeb sex tapes EXCEPT Kim Kardashian and Ray J. Hello Musuem of Sex, lets keep up with the celebrity gossip!



First Asian porn stars...



Tera Patrick is SERIOUSLY the hottest pornographic actress ever.



Gay fucking, guys can do missionary too.



The real life Jessica Rabbit and Betty Page.



I think I have a boner and I haven't seen a single naked booby or cooch. It's the fold-out couch... I've never seen anything sexier than that fold-out couch.



A vintage sex cartoon from the exhibit.

Russell Peters

Here's Russell Peters making fun of the Chinese language. It's really really true but he missed out on Shanghai-nese and the RRRRRs because Chinese people can't pronounce R and Ls.

The New Rich in China

Did you guys see the "I Hate Sarah Marshall" ads? They're everywhere and I couldn't help but to peek the website. It's a real blogspot blog! With that said, I'm here typing in my blog because Apatow made it cool again!

http://www.ihatesarahmarshall.com

My first entry is on the development of China from rags to riches and the overally tacky. China's always had a thing for whitestheitcs since Yuan Ming Yuan, the Euro baroque architecture monster in Beijing. The British and French once said, "Yo China is ripp'n our steeze, we gotta take back what our momma gave us." Bombs were dropped and Yuan Ming Yuan soon perished in the fire.

Now there's a new wave of rich Chinese and their over the top whitesthetically pleasing scenic mansions. Take a look at these photos taken from Julia Calfee's website. Unfortunately, the taste is rather tacky. It's like winning the lottery and going insanely Liberace.

This is how Yuan Ming Yuan looks like now. I've seen it with my own eyes, the craftmanship is super detailed - hybrid euro and chinese awesomo powa! And that is why why white men should have half chinese (or Asian) babies, but that is another story... Anyone who visits Beijing should visit The YMY.



Bootleg YMYs, chinese style.