Pirates of the Caribbean / Little Man

(All of a sudden my blog is now a film blog.)

Rushed, you could tell by the movie poster - it's a photo of Johnny Depp with some smoke /fog action. What happened to the wonderful photoshop work from movie 1 and 2. Even the marketing campaign sucked! I saw more Spiderman 3 ads than Pirates. The movie was alright - great effects and fighting but some cheesy love shit going on with Calypso and Davy Jones. We all know she a ho and a home wrecker (like Evan Richard Wood) coz she done up Odysseus for 10 years. Calypso was played by a black woman though so I guess the interracial-ness made it hot. Also, why the hell is Keith Richards even in this? Pirates should take their time making part 4 coz there will be part 4 and it really doesn't seem that interesting. Please prove me wrong because I love Depp.


Great design.


Great design, again.


That's some bullshit art direction. What happened?

I just watched Little Man... and I've seen White Chicks. I know they're bad movies but I like dumb shit. Black comedy is brilliant and I mean it.

Spiderman 3 / Snakes On A Plane

Snakes On A Plane actually did not suck. Black people are funny. Seeing Kenan Thompson reminded me of "All That" when old school TLC promoted safe sex by wearing condoms on their faces. Rachel Blanchard from "Are you Afraid of the Dark" was in it too. Although she played a rich Paris-esque white girl, her name was however, MERCEDES. You tell me gurlfriend mmmhmmm.



Topher Grace played a sexy asshole in Spiderman 3. Tobey McGuire was also sexy asshole when he went all emo-gothed out. I've always thought they were the same person, so it's no surprise that they played sexy assholes together.



Oh and also, if I was a Miyazaki character.

An Inconvenient Truth

We're all going to die!
Al Gore is the new Captain Planet!
WATCH IT!

Phallic Mammary Phone Themes

Wow, look what I found! Someone went all out and made, not one, but three Phallic Mammary phone themes! It even comes with theme songs. I hope it's something nasty like Lil Kim.

http://www.sk3themes.com/index.php?author=xlotusx

Brazil / Heathers

Brazil had nothing to do with Andrienna Lima or hot sandy beaches, but it's about govenment security and unforbidden love :( The art direction reminded me of Blade Runner and Super Mario Brothers. Even Bob Hoskins, who played Mario, was in it. I used to get him confused with Danny Devito. Overall, the film was pretty tight though it should've ended a couple of times instead it went on forever.



Heathers was supposed to be Clueless and Mean Girls but it was fuck'n Columbine and Virgina Tech. The film actually had a story. I was hoping to see a bunch of hot girls going shopping and giving each other makeovers and playing matchmaker and then stealing each other boyfriends. I dig shit like that. Oh well, I still like watching the young Shannen Doherty. I reminiscence the time when channel 11, once WPIX (before WB, before CW11), and all they did was play "Girls Just Want To Have Fun" and Shannen played the quirky little sister.